Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Some Team Beat Some Other Team in Some Game

  • Everyone is trying really, really hard to convince the world that this was a great game. It was not. It was a pretty boring game until the second half of the fourth quarter. And, again, despite what you hear and read, neither quarterback played very well. I thought both looked very pedestrian throughout the game.

  • Tom Brady was 27/41 for 276 yards, 2 touchdowns, and 1 interception. (What the heck was he thinking on that interception?? It was such a bad decision and an even worse throw.) The Giants’ defense did not dominate the game as they did in 2007, but they did enough to keep Brady from finding a rhythm late in the game.
Aww. Maybe you won't have to wait another 7 years to go back.

  • Eli Manning had approximately five good passes in the entire game. Other than that, he looked like typical Eli - including a few terrible throws that looked like guaranteed interceptions except for the fact that they were playing New England’s inept secondary.

  • I mean, New England Patriots defense has been horrifically bad this season. (This is the defense that allowed Jason Campbell 344 passing yards, Ryan Fitzpatrick 676 yards in two meetings, Vince Young 400 yards, Matt Moore 281 yards, even Tyler Palko put up 230 yards. Chad Henne had 416 yards!! Dan Orlovsky had 353 yards - DAN ORLOVSKY!!! I’ll just leave it at that.) Against this hideously terrible defense, Eli Manning managed 296 yards and 1 touchdown. Ladies and gentlemen, your Super Bowl MVP.

"This is so much better than the Super Bowl!"

  • The game was not terrible, but it was a reminder that these were two average teams playing for the championship. Aside from the their embarrassing defense, the Patriots only beat one team with a winning record all season long. The one team they did beat was on a fluke missed 32-yard field goal.

  • As for the Giants, they gave up more points than they scored in the regular season. By comparison, the Packers outscored their opponents by more than 200 points. The Giants gave up more points than any of the other teams in the NFC except for Tampa Bay, Minnesota, Carolina, and St. Louis. The Packers - the 32nd ranked defense - gave up 41 fewer points than the Giants. The Patriots - the 31st ranked defense - gave up 58 fewer points. The Saints - the 30th ranked defense - gave up 61 fewer points. And I’m supposed to believe this is the best team in the league?

  • Furthermore, the Giants loss to the Washington Redskins - TWICE!!! I’m sure if we look up all the rules and bylaws, there must be some fine print that disqualifies any team that loses to a Rex Grossman-led team twice in one season from Super Bowl contention.
Yes, this man beat the champs not once, but twice.

  • I just don’t get why people are trying to sell this game as a super-exciting, epic battle between two dominant teams. Everyone is talking about Manning’s fourth-quarter pass to Mario Manningham along the sideline. It was an excellent pass and a great catch, and Manningham was incredible at making sure he had both feet inbounds - but, come on, don’t you see this play five times a Sunday during the regular season? Packers’ fans, how many times a game does Jordy Nelson make this catch? And people are trying to say it rivals the Helmet Catch? Puh-lease.
Oh, Jordy.

  • Likewise, I saw some crazy people trying to argue that Justin Tuck “dominated” the game, more so than he did 4 years ago. Don’t get me wrong, I love Justin Tuck. He’s one of my favorite non-Packer players. And he played well. He had 2 sacks, 3 quarterback hits (including one that forced the safety), and contributed to Brady’s overall discomfort. But let’s not be ridiculous - his performance this year was not anywhere close to his Super Bowl performance in 2007, which, in my opinion, was one of the most incredible single-game performances by a defensive player. I remember hearing Tuck’s name all game long in the 2007 Super Bowl; he seemed to be involved in every single play. This time around he had a solid game, but nothing like 2007.
You're still incredible, though.
  • And spare me the Tom-Brady’s-reputation-slash-legacy-is-tarnished-now. The New York Giants have twice beaten the Patriots in Super Bowls where the Pats were favored. That’s a big deal. They should be congratulated for it. But it hardly affects the legacy that Tom Brady has built: 5 Super Bowl appearances, 3 rings, and pages and pages of records. And that’s supposed to mean less because he lost two close games to the same team? C’mon now.
He'll always be in the "best ever" discussion.

  • My point is people are being absolutely ridiculous about what actually happened in this game. Brady played okay. Manning played okay. The Giants defense played okay. And the Patriots receivers played less than okay. The game was okay. That’s what really happened. So let's all scale back the superlatives, okay? Okay.

Now, for some other random stuff:

  • Patriots WR Tiquan Underwood got an awesome haircut for the big game.

I guess that's what you get when you play for Satan's BFF..

  • Now, I may be the only person in the world who does not think Gisele is pretty, but people need to back off her! She caught a lot of flak prior to a game because she sent an email to her family and friends asking them for thoughts and prayers for her husband on Super Bowl Sunday. How is this news? A wife wants her husband to do well in one of the biggest moments of his life and the media criticizes her for it?? Then, after the game, while being heckled by some obnoxious New York Giants fans about her husband's play, Gisele snapped that it was the Patriots' receivers' fault for not catching Brady's passes. Probably not the nicest or smartest thing to say, but, to be fair, they did drop some big passes, and I'm sure she didn't think her words would end up making news. As a general rule, maybe you shouldn't taunt a woman right after her spouse's heart has been crushed. It seems like a pretty natural reaction to me.
But I still don't think she's pretty. Great hair, though.

  • Aaron Rodgers was totally right in his surprisingly candid comments on the Pro Bowl. I really like football, but even I couldn’t watch much of that game. Though, to be honest, I don't think there's much that can be or needs to be done about the Pro Bowl.

  • The best part of the Pro Bowl was that Air Force sergeant singing the national anthem so beautifully.  Especially right after Hot Chelle Rae’s live performance made my ears bleed.

  • Sometimes I think Mike Pereira is intentionally trying to be the most insufferable man alive. No one could be this self-important without a touch of irony, right?

  • The whole point of this post is that this game would have been so much better if the Packers had played. How much fun would a New Orleans-Green Bay Super Bowl have been???? (Who needs the AFC?)
Yeah, last year was way more fun.

I miss football already, but I guess with the season over, it's time for this blog to turn its attention to cats full-time.


  1. Agree with everything except the Brazilian. It'd be great if she could learn to SHUT. IT.

  2. No, I think it's time to find something else to do, preferably involving humans. But the rants have been great. ESPN should hire you.

  3. Now look, the game was pretty good. It was the super bowl so all plays are magnified because the pressure is so great. and it came down to the very end. These were the best teams. I mean, the Pack got bounced bad. New York beat them, no fluke, and Pat offense is pretty good. Sour grapes?